Why Do Girls Go to the Bathroom in Groups?
There are a couple of reasons. One is because they want to talk to each other, probably about what’s been happening. If you’re out with a group of people and want to share what you just heard, what you just saw or what you think think about what’s happening, leaving the group and going to the bathroom with your friends gives you some space to talk about things.
The other is the line, that long line for the women’s room that often exists at bars/clubs. When a group goes to the bathroom, they can stand in line together … and then talk about what’s been happening.
And bathrooms can be a great place to bond with other women!
But one of the reasons that many girls go to the bathroom in groups is one they might not think about, and that’s safety. If you’re a girl you’ve probably had it drilled into your head from a young age that you shouldn’t be alone in order to avoid something bad happening to you. As girls grow into women, those lessons stick in their head to the point where they might not consciously think about why they do what they do, but deep down they know its safer for them to be in a group than it is to be by themselves
If you’re a guy reading this stop rolling your eyes and go ask a girl you know what kinds of thing she does to keep herself safe when she’s alone. And then listen to the answer… really listen. Whether it’s how they carry their purse, or walk with keys in their hand, or lie to their car service drivers about where they’re going and who’s waiting for them, girls have an arsenal of tips and tricks to try and keep themselves safe.
I do an activity in my class where I ask women if they could be a man for one day what’s the one thing they would do. While peeing standing up in a common answer (seriously, women are very interested in what this feels like), a few years ago one woman said:
I would walk down the street by myself and not fear for my safety.
You could have heard a pin drop after she said that.
And while we had a great conversation once that silence broke, it wasn’t the last time I heard a statement like that.
Well that got a lot heavier than I expected!
…
I’ve been trying to find the right ending for this post, one that will make people feel a bit lighter, but honestly I really don’t want to. Because until we actually talk about the risk that women face simply for being women nothing will change.
Until next time, have fun and be safe!
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