How Can One Reduce Her Body Count?

I’ve been getting *a lot* of questions about body counts in the last few weeks, and I’m not sure why.

I’ve written about this before and my thoughts on it haven’t really changed, so I’m going to repeat myself a bit.

There’s really nothing you can do to reduce your body count – the only thing you could do is change what criteria you use to come up with your body count number. But that doesn’t really change how many people you’ve been with.

If you’re not happy with your number, if you think it’s too high, ask yourself why you think that. Is it because you’re comparing yourself to your friends? Do you think they’re being honest when they give you their numbers?

Is a current or potential partner making you feel uncomfortable about your number? If so, do you really want to be with someone who is shaming you for you past?

I get that it’s important for a partner to know a bit about your sexual history. After all knowing, how many partners you’ve been with recently, and whether or not you were using condoms, can help them make decisions about potential STI risk.

But you have to ask yourself how much of your sexual history a partner is entitled to. Do they deserve enough information to make an informed risk decision? Yes. Are they entitled to know everything? I’m not so sure about that.

People may not want to disclose some of their sexual history because they might feel shame about some of their decisions. They may have had experiences with rape, assault or sexual trauma that they’re not comfortable with disclosing. Or maybe a person just wants to keep some things private.

I’d love to hear from people what they think about this – do you think a current sexual partner is entitled to know your entire sexual history?

But for the person who submitted this question, and those who’ve asked me about this recently I’m going to repeat what I has said in my previous post:

If you’re bothered by how high your number is, you might want to ask yourself why. Is it really just that the number is “too high” and if so, what’s influencing your sense of what’s “normal”? Are you feeling judged by others? Are you regretting some of your choices?

Figuring out why your number is bothering you is really important to help you become more comfortable with the sexual decisions you make for yourself for today and for the future.

Until next time, be safe and have fun!

Have a question you want answered? Submit it here: https://milsteinhealthconsulting.com/heydrsue