Is It Okay To Prefer Anal To Vaginal Sex?
If you prefer it, then yes its okay.
Now, not everyone might agree with that. There are certainly religions and cultures that do not view anal sex as acceptable, between people of any gender.
But from a sexual health perspective, I think it’s important that you engage in behaviors that you enjoy.
There are a few things I want you to keep in mind. The tissue inside the anus is less elastic than vaginal tissue. This means that’s its easier to have microtears and those can lead to easier transmission of some STIs.
I often suggest people use lube during vaginal sex. Lube can make vaginal sex more enjoyable. I definitely suggest it if someone is struggling with being able to get and stay wet during vaginal sex.
With that said, I highly recommend using lube for anal sex. Anal tissue cannot self-lubricate, so lube will make things more comfortable and can help with the issue of tearing.
Something to keep in mind is pH level. The pH level inside the anus is higher than the pH inside the vagina. This means that you shouldn’t be using the same lube for both vaginal and anal sex. Check out this article for more information on lube and pH.
While water based lube can be a good option for vaginal sex, most people prefer something thicker for anal. Often they’ll choose either oil based lube or silicone lube.
But keep in mind that if you’re using a condom for anal sex, it needs to be safe to use with your lube. Oil based lubes are not recommended for use with most external condoms.
While we’re talking about condoms, if you’re concerned about STIs, you may want to consider an internal condom for anal sex. Internal condoms provide a little bit more coverage from STIs. Check out this article out for more information about internal condoms, external condoms and STIs.
If STIs aren’t a concern for you, then I would still recommend a lube to help cut down on pain during anal sex. But avoid numbing lubes! Pain is the body’s way of telling you that something is not okay. And you want to make sure you’re getting the message if your body is trying to tell you that something is wrong.
Defintiely have a conversation with your partner about your preferences. Just because you prefer anal sex to vaginal sex doesn’t mean that they do. And you don’t want to pressure them into doing something they’re not comfortable with.
I definitely suggest having this conversation prior to engaging in sex play. This isn’t something you want to bring up in the moment, as your partner may have some questions for you.
If you want to read some of my responses to other questions about anal sex, check out “What are some of the negative effects of having unprotected sex?” and “Is anal sex for a female dangerous?”
Until next time, be safe and have fun!
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