I Think I Am Ready To Try Anal Play! Is There Anything I Need To Do To Prepare My Butthole?

Great question!

You need to feel as comfortable as possible. Some people like to go to the bathroom first because they’re afraid they might poop during anal sex. Some people like to shower because they’re afraid of smell.

You do whatever you need to do to feel ready.

I’m glad you mentioned lube because this is important. Unlike the vagina, the anus doesn’t self-lubricate. And a lack of lube during anal might cause pain. It can also cause microtears, which can increase the chances of STI transmission.

The natural pH of the anus is usually between 7 – 8. So if you’re using a water-based lube you want a pH in that same range. As important as it is to make sure you’re using a lube that’s the correct pH, most manufacturers don’t make this information readily available. So you may need to do some research.

But since this is anal play, I would actually recommend you use an oil-based or silicone-based lube. They’ll provide a bit more cushioning. And this can be more comfortable during anal play.

You don’t need to worry about pH if you’re using an oil-based or silicone-based lube.

But there are other things you need to think about. Both of these types of lubes can stain fabrics, like clothing and bedding.

And if you’re using a condom, then you want to use silicone-based lubes. You shouldn’t use latex condoms with oil-based lubes.

And I would strongly suggest using condoms during anal play with a partner. Even if you’ve both been tested for STIs it can make clean up easier, and may feel more comfortable for you.

If you’re using a sex toy you can also use a condom with that.

If you are planning on going from anal play to vaginal play, then you absolutely need to use a new condom when you make that switch!

Okay, we’ve talked about lubes and condoms, now for a few more things as you get started.

Start slow and start small.

If you’re using a toy I recommend starting with a smaller one and working your way up in size. If you’re using a toy you really need to use something that has a flared base.

A flared base means that the base is wider than the toy itself. You can see that in this picture.

Photo by Anna Shvets

Things can get stuck in the butt. Having a toy with a flared base will help prevent this from happening.

If you’re starting anal play with a partner, I would suggest that he use a finger first. Then you can work your way up to a penis.

Start small, start slow and realize you can stop.

You may start trying anal play and find it really uncomfortable. If it doesn’t feel right, stop! You can take a break and try again. You can try another time. You don’t have to go all the way to full penetration the first time you try anal.

If you’re by yourself, stopping shouldn’t be issue. If you are with your partner, then you want to make sure you have a conversation about stopping. Before you start any type of play.

You may find a safe word helpful. A safe word is a word that indicates everything should stop. It should be something that you don’t normally say during sex play. Like pineapple.

Remember that you’re trying out something new. You don’t have to become an anal queen on your first experience. Go slow and check in with yourself to see how you feel about it.

And don’t forget the lube!

Until next time, be safe, and have fun!

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